Okay... I mean no offense to you, but... I need to say that almost nothing in here made sense. mostly Nightmare Chaos.

In the beginning, he was Luna, put into a lake that made evil make you evil or something, right? Why did Luna become a guy? there isn't any explanation of that, and none of the other villains comment on it. Secondly, everything Nightmare Chaos said about Celestia sounded completely like blatant lies he was making on the spot with evidence to give at all. He said she was a vampire thing with no proof, he said Celestia planned on murdering Twilight with no proof, and he also said Celestia was a chaotic fiend, with no roof again. if Alicorns need to drink blood to live forever, how in the hell did Luna live for thousands of years without drinking blood? And if the reason Celestia was weak was because she hadn't sucked any blood (Which she would have done with one of her guards if twilight was suddenly gone and she needed power; people do desperate things when they are desperate), why was Luna/Nightmare Chaos powerful?

Even weirder, Twilight believes him. All of it. With no reason at all, she accepts everything told to her at face value. She doesn't demand proof, and she doesn't point out the many things that make no sense. When she does, Night Chaos says what I think was supposed to be meaningful with 'you're still clinging to facts, not truth!
Truth and facts are basically the same thing; those aren't words that mean vastly different things. If a fact is that you ate a sandwich for, the truth would ALSO be that you a sandwich for lunch, not that you murdered a bear and ate it raw for lunch.

Another note: if you're going to use Alicorns in your story, there needs to be an explanation for them. Where did they come from/ Who are there parents? And in this case, where did the army that the Apocalypse ponies have come from, and how did the Apocalypse ponies, who were once normal dudes, live a regular life as an alicorn?

Another thing I need to vent on, how do the powers of both the villains and the heroes work? None of the heroes do anything that relates to any element I can think of; they mostly shoot projectiles or something, or revive the dead somehow. Basically every evil dude also has unexplained boundaries for there powers. All of them seem to be able to make illusions, do mind control, teleport without using their magic, an dare often made un-hurtable. Why would Famine have a fake famine!?! WHY!?! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

WHO THE HELL IS HYDRAMBO?!?